Judo Gold Medalist Talks Abuse and Recovery

Kayla Harrison grabbed the attention of 700 Swampscott High kids Tuesday and threw it where her story led, places empty and full.

The US Olympian from Marblehead even threw one of the kids — sturdy football player and wrestler Maleek Newsome — to the auditorium floor in a demonstration showing skills that made her the first American ever to gold medal in judo.

For all the entertainment her visit generated and the buzz that stirred over the gold medal she passed around to students, her talk was on abuse, with stops at silence, action and recovery.

Sex Abuse By Coach Can't Stop Kayla

Kayla, in sneakers and jeans rolled at the bottom, standing below the auditorium stage, didn't talk much about the circumstances surrounding the abuse.

She did talk about its effects. 

Her story started in Ohio.

She was a wildly energetic child and at 6 years old took to the judo mat.

She reveled in throwing and being thrown — mostly she was thrown for losses in the early matches.  

At 8, she moved to a new club and progressed in the sport, and knew she wanted to beat people up for a living.

There are four ways to win a judo match: pinning the opponent for 25 seconds; an arm bar, arm pulling that leads to either the opponent tapping out in pain or a broken arm; choking the opponent until the opponent taps out; or throwing the opponent flat on the back, akin to a knockout in boxing.

Kayla's favorite way to win is to throw her opponent. 

She, however, was thrown by the sexual abuse that transpired at a judo club in Ohio.

She was sexually abused by her coach, abuse that she kept quiet about for years, the secret leading to shame, cutting herself and thoughts of suicide.

At 16, she told her mom that her coach, Daniel, had abused her for years.

Healing in a Wakefield Dojo

Her mom pursued a criminal case against the man and moved Kayla 836 miles to Wakefield, Mass., where she enrolled in Pedro's Judo Center.

Her mom knew she needed judo to heal.

And it was in Wakefield that she started to put the pieces together, she said.

But not without hitting bottom.

After she won a stunning victory, winning the US Open at 16, and her team was ecstatic with the victory, she was empty, numb.

She was going to quit judo and go to New York and serve people coffee. That was her plan, to go away and become a coffee server.

She was in a deep dark place where she couldn't get out of bed, couldn't brush her teeth. She told her coach she was quitting.

Her coach, Jimmy Pedro, a rough-around-the edges guy, told her something that would turn her toward more fulfilling days.

He said, "You know what kid, what happened to you happened to you ... you are only a victim if you allow yourself to be a victim. Now you have a chance to do something."

The change wasn't straightaway. No flash of light. But his words made a difference and set her on a path to fulfilling her dreams.

Her dream was realized when she became the first American to win a gold medal in judo at the 2012 Summer Olympics in London.

There was no greater feeling than standing on the podium knowing she had achieved her goal of being the best in the world at her sport.

The key that moved her in that direction, she told the students, many of whom sat, hands folded, leaning forward, was a willingness to talk about the things that had happened to her.

It took the courage of people who were sexually abused to talk about what had happened to them to make it known that abuse does happen in church communities, at universities, in cities and towns.

That was why she was speaking, she said, and encouraging people to support those who have been abused.

In the question and answer part of the presentation many of the students wanted to know how much she could bench press, how much she could squat, what it was like to be at the Olympics.

One person asked what happened to the man who had abused her.

She said that he pleaded guilty and was sentenced to the maximum sentence, 10 years in federal prison.

She was in the court room and gave a victim impact statement before the judge sentenced the man. It was Feb. 28, 2008.

She paused and told the audience that the last thing he said to her was: "I love you." 

The words sounded strange and unsettling.

Walk For Abuse Victims Coming to Salem Common

She invited students to join the HAWC (Healing Abuse Working for Change) May 5th for its 21st Walk and second run at the Salem Common.

The first HAWC walk drew only 250 people. This year organizers expect 1,500 people to participate.

The event helps HAWC support people who have experienced domestic abuse.

Kayla is this year's honorary Walk/Run Chair.

To register to Walk or Run click link http://hawcdv.donorpages.com/WalkRunforHAWC/.

If you'd like to be a corporate sponsor for the Walk/Run click this link https://interland3.donorperfect.net/weblink/weblink.aspx?name=hawc&id=1 and indicate you are a Walk/Run sponsor in the notes section of the application.

To learn more about HAWC, visit www.hawcdv.org